An Inconsequential List of Things I Shall Probably Never Find Time To Do
I have endured two days off sick from work, during which my wife imposed a forced ban from the computer (due to its perceived influence on my recurring migraines), and I have been thinking – in between watching bad imported US mid-morning comedy – about the many, many things that sit in a dusty corner of my to-do list, condemned to a life of neglect and eventually to be forgotten forever:
“Beneath the Poverty Line” will never be the quirky, dark comedy tale of penniless brothers Nickel and Dime (named for the coins embedded in their scalps, courtesy of careless travellers throwing wishes from the railway line beneath which the brothers live), as they investigate the sudden appearance of a dead man just outside their hometown of Poverty, Idaho…
The as-yet-untitled comic book adventures of a ruthless hitman and his humorous yet touching relationship with his teenage daughter will never be written, let alone illustrated…
A retelling of Shakespeare’s “The Two Gentlemen of Verona” set in the rarefied world of Florida retirement homes, with the genders of all the major characters reversed. Not to be…
A musical all about capital-L Love, featuring songs such as “Your Keys On My Table (Your Hand In My Hand)” and “Leaning On Vanity’s Elbow”...
An ambitious orchestral opera score in 11/8 time to a lyrical adaptation of Aleister Crowley’s “Mass of the Phoenix”...
That’s not to mention the countless ideas that have occurred when pen and paper were out of reach (or when I naively assumed I would remember it when I woke up).
I don’t really know where I’m going with this, or even why I wrote it. Perhaps as catharsis, or an aide memoire. Perhaps I just miss the traffic and comments after last week’s flurry of activity. Perhaps it is just late and I should go to bed…
Filed under: Personal.
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Comments
- Alex Armstrong
- 1715 days ago
- Matt you are sure you’re not me? ;)
Reading this list inspired me to shift through my own shoebox of discard script ideas. I also one day dream of finishing my Lynchian tale of small town vigilantism “The Bellringers”. - #2
- Stephane Deschamps (nota-bene.org)
- 1715 days ago
Mmmmh Matt, have you ever heard of Body Bags?The as-yet-untitled comic book adventures of a ruthless hitman and his humorous yet touching relationship with his teenage daughter will never be written, let alone illustrated…
cf. Dark Horse
I can tell: I translated it into French more than five years ago. Very funny, although a bit simplistic IMHO…- #3
- Matthew Pennell
- 1715 days ago
- Stephane: Heh, that’s pretty funny – didn’t Mack also feature in the ‘Accident Man’ strip as well?
- #4
- Kate Bolin
- 1712 days ago
- And I’ll never finish the sitcom about the shopgirl who worked in the porn shop owned by an old man who interacted with ancient deities…__
- #5
- Graham Bancroft
- 1711 days ago
- I understand.
- #6
- Stephane Deschamps (nota-bene.org)
- 1711 days ago
Heh, that’s pretty funny – didn’t Mack also feature in the ‘Accident Man’ strip as well?
That’s a good question, to which I have no answer (does that sound like a zen answer, or what?)- #7
- Peter J Lambert
- 1711 days ago
- Dammit! You stole my idea for the modern Shakespeare!
- #8
- Matthew Pennell
- 1711 days ago
- I think Baz Luhrmann might have got a bit of a jump on us with the modern Shakespeare idea… ;)
- #9
- Kate Bolin
- 1710 days ago
- Actually, I think West Side Story beat all y’all…
- #10
- Matthew Pennell
- 1710 days ago
- Oh yeah, forgot about that one…
- #11
Get well soon, enjoy the time off work/away from your computer.